A Realistic Self-Care Guide for a Young Mom

From the day you found out you were pregnant, life was never the same again. You read every pregnancy- and infant-related article you saw. You modeled the nursery after the Pinterest board named after your little one. You stocked up the pantry with pumps, baby formula, sterilizers, solids, and infant-friendly supplements.

Regardless of how much you prepared for the arrival of your little one, you are still learning how to care for this tiny, unpredictable, precious being of yours. Throw another baby into the mix: your job. Where you are now back in full force. The moments you have to yourself are those when you are asleep. Scarce, but you are getting by.

You might be wondering how to take care of yourself amidst this new life. It could be a lingering thought you dare not utter, for fear that it might make you seem less sacrificial of a mother—by thinking of yourself instead of your child.

But the truth is wanting to care for yourself doesn’t make you love your little one less. Caring for yourself postpartum builds you up to be stronger and healthier, with more to give to your little one. And self-care doesn’t have to be grandiose. Here’s how to take care of you at the heart of motherhood.

Be kind to your body

Just as you worry if you are pumping sufficient milk for your little one or feeding them their daily dose of vitamin c, be purposeful in eating well for yourself too. Ensure that you are having a balanced diet of fruits, vegetables, proteins, grains, and dairy. In particular, proteins help your body recover from childbirth and build your muscle strength. Add an egg to your breakfast toast or a spoonful of yogurt to your post-dinner snack.

It may be instinctive to eat less to lose the baby weight fast. It can be difficult to embrace the mom-tum on some days. But approaching weight loss safely—a healthy postpartum diet and exercise—helps ensure that you have sufficient nutrition to breastfeed and recover postpartum, and energy to cope with your daily tasks.

When you are sleep-deprived for days or even months, exercise may be the last thing on your mind. But gentle exercise can help boost your energy level and relieve stress. Start with a 5-minute postnatal pilates stretch routine. Stretching is an ideal exercise, relieving body aches caused by childbirth and a new lifestyle of breastfeeding, swaddling, and sleeping in odd positions.

However, it is crucial to listen to your body to prevent injuries. If your workout is causing your more pain than relief, modify the exercise or stop immediately. The key is to be patient with yourself. Your body is still adapting to childbirth and motherhood. Don’t be discouraged if your fitness or weight loss plan is not progressing as you hope.

Make sure to drink sufficient fluids each day. Your body will lose water due to increased sweat arising from hormonal changes and breastfeeding. Consuming enough water aids your body’s recovery and regulates your metabolism, allowing you to shed the baby weight while staying hydrated. If you’re working from home, fill up a 1-liter jug before starting your workday. Having it at your desk allows you to drink sufficient water while minimizing disruptions to your workflow.

You don’t have to lose your partner or yourself to motherhood

Schedule a 15-minute check-in to connect with your partner every week. Even with a partner, parenthood can still feel lonely. Such feelings of loneliness and depression don’t have to result in resentment and disconnect. Instead, they can be managed with active communication.

These weekly conversations can be spent delegating tasks, working through misunderstandings and expectations, and showing appreciation for each other. After all, both of you are parents for the first time. Relying on a structured time to facilitate communication can help you support each other meaningfully in this new chapter of your lives together.

If time and resources permit, plan for an activity outside of these conversations every fortnight. Remember that the circumstances are different for each couple. Acknowledging this can better help you plan for an activity that fits both of you while ensuring your little one is being cared for. Be it a stay-home movie night or sex during your baby’s afternoon nap, the main aim is to focus on each other and maintain intimacy as a couple.

Apart from strengthening your relationship with your partner, cultivating your relationship with yourself is crucial too. Do one thing for yourself each day. No, it doesn’t entail expressing an extra 10ml of milk or replying to a work email. It may be doing your skincare routine or calling up a close friend or family. No matter how small that one thing is, this commitment to yourself is vital in grounding you in this motherhood marathon. Napping for a couple more minutes counts too.

Take a deep breath and acknowledge where you are now—in all your confusion, adoration, fatigue, and love. You may be several months into motherhood but every day is still as unpredictable as the first. Just as your baby is learning how to latch, nap, swallow, crawl, you are too an infant on the parenting journey. Learn to mirror the same care for yourself.

This is just one part of the excerpt of the digital guide to motherhood that I will provide.